It’s safe for me to say that it is time for me to move through my apprehensions and self-doubt, and actually commit to my creative flow and sharing. I have so much to offer. By committing to my self expression through my work and sharing (my creativity and voice), I am committing to myself in a new way. I am unlearning the lies and lifetime of conditioning that told me that who I am, what I have to say, do or share means nothing. That it will never be enough. That I will never be enough.
Truly, I am in a period of more fully realizing that now that I am an adult, nothing is getting in my way in this area of my life but myself. No matter how generic all of this may sound (which it kinda is!). But honestly I do feel like because of this block, I am stopping myself from more freely creating and sharing the type of work I really love to do (art, writing, wellness work, etc.).
I do not have to act from this place anymore, and continue the blocking of my creativity and expression. I was not born this way with these specific set of interests, passions, and gifts by accident. I am choosing each day to commit to doing the best I can, to not act from or live in this place. This commit applies to all areas of my life, not only sharing my work and creations.
It is still very fascinating to me how as we are young, the people and adults that happen to be around us have such lasting positive or harmful influences on us. They say or do things (consciously or not) that encourage us to block, discourage, silence, or dampen parts of ourselves. Not to mention the added overwhelming conditioning that society has on us (especially marginalized peoples). Then at some point we grow up and just continue on with the self silencing habits, beliefs and conditioning automatically. Because unfortunately it is all we know of ourselves.
I am not saying it is easy. This is something I have been struggling with for most of my adult life, specifically in the areas of my creation, my work, and my voice being enough to share. But now I am slowly and compassionately moving to a place and new perspective, that what I have to share and say are more than enough, and of value. For me it’s also about learning to move more consistently with this truth each day. It is a process. But ultimately and most importantly my expression is for me, that is truly good enough.
~ Alice Walker
(I love this quote!)